“The mother is the key of all keys. It is through her that a new world will be born. Failure to support mothers with all of our love, strength, and wisdom is the failure of culture itself.”
– Womb Awakening: Initiatory Wisdom for the Creatrix of All Life by Azra Bertrand, M.D. & Seren Bertrand
There is no one right way to mother, nor is there a perfect mother archetype. As women and mothers, the greatest gifts that we can give ourselves are self-compassion and vulnerability. You may not be perfect, but you are doing the best that you can with the knowledge that you have at any given moment. It is totally normal and okay to feel lost and confused – you just have to try to find the courage to reach out to the women around you who are walking the same path.
Motherhood is a journey that will take you into the deepest and most vulnerable parts of yourself. You will make mistakes, and you will get it wrong, many times, but if you are willing to acknowledge this and forgive yourself for your missteps, you will find that things will work themselves out.
Being a conscious mother is a journey of self-discovery, and an honouring of the maternal line that connects past, present and future generations. Exploring the inner landscapes of your being, both in preparation for and during your journey of motherhood, will open the doors to understanding, compassion and unconditional self-love. It is only when you are able to bless yourself with these gifts that you will be able to teach your child how to do the same.
As I have walked my own journey of motherhood, I have made many mistakes and learned many lessons. Here are just 5 tips that have helped me on my path:
1. Discover the Story of Your Maternal Line
Understanding your mother’s and grandmother’s experiences of pregnancy, birth and motherhood brings consciousness to the stories held within your family. Working with these narratives will allow you to better understand the emotions and traumas that your maternal predecessors have been through, which in turn will allow you to prepare yourself for what is to come and make your experience one of love, peace and harmony.
2. Ask About Your Own Birth
It is believed that our mother’s birthing journey can impact our own experience of giving birth. Did she feel supported and safe? Was her rite of passage to motherhood empowering and joyful? You carry the experience of your birth with you, and it is essential to be conscious of how you were brought into the world so that you can enrich your own birthing experience with understanding, harmony and peace.
3. Explore Healing Modalities for Conscious Release Work
There are beautiful, gentle and powerful modalities like craniosacral therapy, holotropic breathwork, rebirthing, family constellation work and hypnobirthing that raise consciousness of body, mind and spirit by offering integration of unconscious inherited patterns.
4. Celebrate Your Body Through Movement
Consider preparing your body for pregnancy and birth through the ancient art of belly dancing. It is a sensual and fun way to bring awareness to the body that incorporates sound, silken textures, vivid colours and the company of other women. It is extremely empowering to become aware of the strength that you hold within your body, and it is a segue into the comforting understanding that your body has been perfectly designed to bear and birth children.
5. Trust What is Natural
Birth is a physiological process that we are designed for. With the advancement of science and the medicalisation of labour and the birth process, it can be easy to become distanced from the ancient birthing wisdom that we naturally carry. Remember that it is your right to make informed decisions around pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding. Do your own research – read, ask questions, challenge that which you are sceptical of, and seek the support of a midwife, doula and lactation consultant. Knowledge is power, and having a community of women who you can trust and who trust you in return is priceless and life changing.
By Olivia Badach